Everyone knows we access reality using 5 senses: sight, hearing, touch, sense of smell, taste. What most of the people ignore, is that everyone of us has a dominant mode. What that means, is that we all have an unconscious preference hailing from our first years of life that determines which of those senses we use most.
So wait a sec, you're saying that I could for instance tend to rely on my sight more than how I rely on my hearing? Well, humans are always relying on sight more than other senses, for obvious reasons. Think about blindness: that's far more constricting than hearing loss. On this point we are all equal. The difference I am speaking of is psychological, that's about the way in which everyone of us prefer to organize his inner perception. So the mode corresponds to the main sense we use in order to depict OUR INNER REALITY. That's what modes are about. If you are visual, you describe your inner world using images, if you are auditory, you describe with words, and if you are kinesthetic you do it by feelings.
Now, I'll tell you how to improve your communication taking advantage of this fact: all you got to do is recognize and adapt your speech to the mode of the person you are talking to, in order to be more significant to her.
Exactly what do you mean?For example, if you're speaking right now with a visual person, you should be adopting a visual-related language. That let you two swim in the same perceptive world. Language has evocative power. When you say a word your mind automatically depicts that meaning into your head. But what if you say "screeching", do you depict that? or rather you listen it into your head? As you understand, a visual word recalls an image, while an auditory one recalls a sound. What about "fear"? This one can only recall an emotion. So that what adapting to your interlocutor mode means: use words that he recalls very well.
In order to determine what is the predominant sense of your interlocutor (or his mode), you must pay really good attention to his words. Listen carefully and look especially for idioms wich reveals a particular inclination. Phrases like: "That's so clear","This appears to be true","I see the point of the matter",
Ok, but first: how is possible to understand the mode of the person I am talking to? And second: what would a "visual" vocabulary be? In order to establish the mode of your interlocutor, you have to be extremely careful about words, phrases and images he chooses. If a person is visual, she will choose expressions and idioms which reveal a visual tendency, like: "I see the point", "this seems to be good", "my point of view is","that's clear enough". As you can see, those are phrases related to sight. The concept is that this kind of phrases evoke something sight-related.
An auditory person will prefer something like: "This sounds pretty good", "There's a good synthony between them". As you can see, those are phrases related to hearing. The concept is that this kind of phrases evoke something sound-related. Think to the word syntony, that's a musical concept.
A khinestetic will choose something like: "That feels good","I catched your idea", "I can't grasp the meaning of it", It's something you got to feel with the body. Even if in a figured way. That tells you about your interlocutor that he has a physical approach to reality.
To enhance your communicative power try to rephrase your ideas in the same mode the person you talk to does. To give you an example, you might be willing to say "this seems to be bad" in order to answer in a visual style, "this sounds bad" to answer in a auditory style, "this feels bad" to answer in a kinesthetic style. This way you'll make your interlocutor recall something much more significant on his side. A good trick is to change verbs in order to make the phrase significant in his mode. To establish which mode an idioms belongs, think it very litteral. Make very good practice on this to get more flexibility in adapting to a given perceptive modality.
effectively...
So wait a sec, you're saying that I could for instance tend to rely on my sight more than how I rely on my hearing? Well, humans are always relying on sight more than other senses, for obvious reasons. Think about blindness: that's far more constricting than hearing loss. On this point we are all equal. The difference I am speaking of is psychological, that's about the way in which everyone of us prefer to organize his inner perception. So the mode corresponds to the main sense we use in order to depict OUR INNER REALITY. That's what modes are about. If you are visual, you describe your inner world using images, if you are auditory, you describe with words, and if you are kinesthetic you do it by feelings.
Now, I'll tell you how to improve your communication taking advantage of this fact: all you got to do is recognize and adapt your speech to the mode of the person you are talking to, in order to be more significant to her.
Exactly what do you mean?For example, if you're speaking right now with a visual person, you should be adopting a visual-related language. That let you two swim in the same perceptive world. Language has evocative power. When you say a word your mind automatically depicts that meaning into your head. But what if you say "screeching", do you depict that? or rather you listen it into your head? As you understand, a visual word recalls an image, while an auditory one recalls a sound. What about "fear"? This one can only recall an emotion. So that what adapting to your interlocutor mode means: use words that he recalls very well.
In order to determine what is the predominant sense of your interlocutor (or his mode), you must pay really good attention to his words. Listen carefully and look especially for idioms wich reveals a particular inclination. Phrases like: "That's so clear","This appears to be true","I see the point of the matter",
Ok, but first: how is possible to understand the mode of the person I am talking to? And second: what would a "visual" vocabulary be? In order to establish the mode of your interlocutor, you have to be extremely careful about words, phrases and images he chooses. If a person is visual, she will choose expressions and idioms which reveal a visual tendency, like: "I see the point", "this seems to be good", "my point of view is","that's clear enough". As you can see, those are phrases related to sight. The concept is that this kind of phrases evoke something sight-related.
An auditory person will prefer something like: "This sounds pretty good", "There's a good synthony between them". As you can see, those are phrases related to hearing. The concept is that this kind of phrases evoke something sound-related. Think to the word syntony, that's a musical concept.
A khinestetic will choose something like: "That feels good","I catched your idea", "I can't grasp the meaning of it", It's something you got to feel with the body. Even if in a figured way. That tells you about your interlocutor that he has a physical approach to reality.
To enhance your communicative power try to rephrase your ideas in the same mode the person you talk to does. To give you an example, you might be willing to say "this seems to be bad" in order to answer in a visual style, "this sounds bad" to answer in a auditory style, "this feels bad" to answer in a kinesthetic style. This way you'll make your interlocutor recall something much more significant on his side. A good trick is to change verbs in order to make the phrase significant in his mode. To establish which mode an idioms belongs, think it very litteral. Make very good practice on this to get more flexibility in adapting to a given perceptive modality.
effectively...
About the Author:
Discover right now the importance of communication at www.importanceofcommunicationforyou.com
No comments:
Post a Comment